after i moved back into my old place, i totally forgot all about this blog. and, i felt so sorry for it. *i shamelessly confess to treating my journals like animated beings* the truth is i have free internet connection at my place and i got my machine with me. all that's missing is a usb wifi thingie, due to the fact the my machine doesn't have a wifi thingie built in with it. so, yeah. i'm guilty of being entirely negligent of everything that i used to take care of, which i don't know whether i should feel really bad about it, like i should. because right now, i don't feel anything at all. i don't care about anything, at all. even with my acads, which is my number one priority, but i still end up failing anyway.
in the past 2 months, i managed to flunk 5 out of my 7 major exams. beat that. i cried once. and, i forced myself into it just to prove to myself i still have feelings. i don't want to go numb. it'll wreck havoc on my academic life. *flashesback to 1.5 years ago when i wanted to go numb to avoid pain from...* anyhow, i also managed to deteriorate my social life*if it ever existed* by staying away from people i really want to be friends with but end up snobbing, and people, generally. i should rot in hell.
someone save me.

earth calling, j*****h. wake up, sleepyhead! no one wants to be friends with you, to begin with. so, why bother dreaming? stick to reality. go back to unconsciously/instinctively pissing people trying to make contact(say wut?!). i kid.i guess i do need people, but i lost every sort of social skill any human being comes built in with.